Monthly archive September, 2007

I never learned the nursery rhyme “What are little boys made of” and only recently heard about it. And the more I thought about it, the more I kept thinking about how an imbalance is created in children at a very young age. Seemingly innocent I believe this nursery rhyme creates an artificial division between the genders. For those of you who’ve never heard it, here it is….

What are little boys made of?
Snips and snails,
And puppy dog tails,
That’s what little boys are made of.

What are little girls made of?
Sugar and spice,
And everything nice,
That’s what little girls are made of.

In my opinion it seems that generally speaking women raised to believe they are princesses and boys are raised as if they are rogues. How true is this in what we see around us every single day?

Now then when I was growing up I played mostly with other boys. And of course girls play mostly with other girls. And what games do the girls play that’s different from the boys? Well just go with me on this one…

Girls play with dolls like Barbie and more recently the Bratz dolls have become very popular. Now as we know Barbie has Ken, and the Bratz dolls have their equivalents. And how to do the girls play with these dolls? They may have doll houses or not but what does happen is they role play real world situations. They get to think about social interactions between boys and girls or between mummy and daddy. You may say, this is nonsense, girls have always played games like this and it doesn’t mean anything. I beg to differ. These games in effect make girls masters of social interactions from a very young age. And when they grow up they are much better prepared for social interactions then most guys will ever be. Think of how comfortable women are at parties talking to each other or to any guys who can hold a good conversation. And how women group together in a public toilet.

In fact someone told me once women can go into a public toilet and come out as ?best friends? but that will never, ever happen to men. They barely look at each other in a public rest rooms. Trust me! I’m one of them

As far back as 1953 there was the Marilyn Monroe film, How to Marry a Millionaire. And this whole objective in this movie is three models moving into a fancy New York apartment with hopes to marry a millionaire. And more recently we had the American reality show, Who Wants To Marry a Millionaire, which ended with the winner out of 50 women, asking for an annulment of the wedding few weeks after the show ended.

Well I digress because what girls are really benefiting from is practising the social dynamics that will allow them to become masters of social interactions with men later in their lives. They get to see into the mind of the daddy or Ken, Barbie’s boyfriend. And they can play out endless amounts of scenarios which prepares them for the real thing.

In the mean time what are the boys up to? They are fighting, they are clubbing up and down trees and other things. They get injured, maybe they cry but they do not engage in the kind of social games that builds conversation skills and also reading other people the way girls do. So boys are at a distinct disadvantage when they get to teenage years. And you know this the time that boys want to start talking to girls, and girl want the boys to approach them and talk to them.

So what are little boys to do when they grow up? Well practise makes perfect is a clich but it works. And this is how you do it, practise with women who are waiters, shop attendants, at checkout counters and everywhere else. Even if you not attracted to them, start quick short conversations. Get their opinion about something and the rest will follow.